How to Tell Your Boyfriend and Family You are Pregnant

Some conversations are definitely easier than others. Breaking the news to your boyfriend and family that you are unexpectedly pregnant is one of the hardest conversations to have, and not knowing how they will respond is incredibly stressful. 

A lot depends on your current relationship with both, but no matter what, honesty is always the best policy. How you go about it will depend on different factors. Let’s look at the steps you may wish to take.

First, Have You Confirmed Your Pregnancy?

Before talking with anyone, you may want to confirm your pregnancy with additional pregnancy tests and an ultrasound. 

Experts estimate that as many as 26% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. That’s more than one in four pregnancies! You can still get a positive pregnancy test result days or even weeks after a miscarriage.

Many pregnancy help centers offer no-cost, confidential pregnancy testing and ultrasounds to verify that your pregnancy is developing and you haven’t miscarried. If you need referrals, please contact the Lamb of God Maternity Home nearest you.

Do You Know You Have Options?

Once you’ve confirmed your pregnancy, take some time to learn about your options. An unexpected pregnancy is overwhelming and even sometimes frightening. Before talking to your boyfriend or family, find out what is available. 

Feel free to contact a Lamb of God counselor who can talk with you about open adoption and parenting. Both of our locations offer a 24/7 Helpline where you can get answers to your questions without judgment or shame. 

Prepare Yourself Emotionally

How do you feel about your pregnancy? Do you need to speak with someone first to sort through the emotions? Once again, our counselors are available 24/7 to help you.

Once you have confirmed that you are pregnant and discussed your options, you will feel more prepared to communicate your news. Choose the right time. Pregnancy hormones can cause mood swings, so ensure you are relaxed and ready to answer questions. 

Telling Your Boyfriend

Tell him when you are ready if you and your boyfriend are in a loving, healthy relationship. Although he may be shocked and frightened, give him time to absorb the news. You may want him to visit a pregnancy help center with you. 

Do not tell your boyfriend alone if you are in an unsafe or violent relationship. Often, pregnancy increases violence in an already toxic situation. Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800) 799-SAFE (7233) for help in an unsafe relationship.

Do not let him blame or manipulate you. Ultimately, only you can decide how to handle the pregnancy. 

Telling Your Parents

Once again, much depends on your relationship with your parents. If you have a strong, close relationship with them, expect them to be emotional. They may feel disappointed, angry, sad, and worried. However, as you calmly explain your choices, they will see that you have done your research and want to make a mature decision.

It took you time to absorb the reality of your pregnancy, and they need time, too. Give them space to express their feelings, and try to remain patient and understanding. Reassure them that you want their support and know this is difficult to accept.

If your relationship with your parents is rocky, take someone with you to tell them. Your safety is most important.

Lamb of God Maternity Homes Are Here for You

If your conversations don’t go as planned, know we are here to help. Some parents become so angry at their daughters that they kick them out of the house. If that happens, there is a place for you here.

If you are not prepared to parent, we can discuss the option of placing your child for adoption. We offer a safe space to talk, ask questions, and learn about your options, and we provide several referrals to services that can assist you. 

To get more information or speak with a caring counselor, fill out our confidential online Contact Form or call the Lamb of God Maternity Home nearest you. Let us help you take that next step.